Tuesday, April 5, 2011

on my way...

back down to normal.. This was an abrupt cycle up and it ended quickly... Very weird.. I spent some time rereading everything I've written in this journal.. wow... The patterns are very obvious now to me, and I recharted all my highs and lows... I'm def. a rapid cycler. Started a new med per the Pdoc yesterday. She squeezed me in to an appt and I was very on edge when I got there. I became really agitated really quickly and was just plain angry that she wasn't listening to me properly and not seeing what I was seeing. I finally got her to state that she agreed with my previous dx of bipolar though, which isn't something she's done yet. She just kept asking me what I was seeing... so frustrating when I had JUST told her. Made for a very irate appt. She wanted to in patient me because I was so on edge and irritable but I told her there was no way with 3 kids that was going to happen. Her arguement was that they could manage meds and monitor side effects much easier that way and they'd be able to stop the high. We settled for trying Depakote again at a higher dose. I was on a low dose for migraines at one point and it aggravated my highs because it wasn't a strong enough dose. I'm hopeful this time around. Hopefully now that I'm getting back to normal I'll stay that way and won't go "down". We'll see! Here's hoping.

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