Monday, April 12, 2010

Home is?

Everyone knows the saying "Home is where the heart is." Right? I have a hard time with the idea of "home" vs. "house". We've been in the same place for 7 years. And ever year I get the moving itch. Some of it I know is the "running away from my problems" jazz. But the other feelings? It's weird. I love the excitement of something new, don't get me wrong.. but... I look at my house, and I compare it to my friends houses.. They are settled. Let me explain. Decorations, paint, sentiment that claims the space and shouts out "this is MINE". You don't see much of that in my house. Infact, before visiting my sister in NC, I didn't have anything on the walls, except for a herbal display in the kitchen. I knew the kitchen was MINE, and marked it thus. The rest of the house? Not so much. Oh sure our stuff was cluttered in every nook and cranny.. but that was different. So when I came home from my sister's, I put up pictures of the kids. Still not really mine, still not "decorated" or "pretty". I feel antsy in my house. I wonder if that has anything to do with the house vs home concept. I haven't taken pride in my house really and I never really understood my hubby's need to be proud of our yard. I wonder if it's because it hasn't become a home to me yet. I'm hopeful that if I can get to the point of housework that is more maintenance and routine, instead of massive mess to clean, that I'll have time to really look at my house, and then make it mine. We don't have much money, I know.. I won't be able to do things like put paint on the walls or buy artwork.. but I'm sure if I can learn to take pride in my house, I'll find something to make it my home... I hope at any rate..

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